


A Sinful Heart

by Anonymous



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, The Trials of Apollo - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst, Angst without a happy ending, Break Up, Guilt, Half-Sibling Incest, Implied Masturbation, Incest, Jealousy, Multi, Particurlarly Bad, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:00:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27703817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: When Hazel's heart stops beating for Frank, who would be the next target? And why it was somebody who should be forbidden?
Relationships: Nico di Angelo/Hazel Levesque, Nico di Angelo/Will Solace
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12
Collections: Banned Together Bingo 2020, anonymous





	A Sinful Heart

Hazel hated it when Nico called her sister.

It was stupid because is something she wanted in the past; to have that familiarity that only belonged to Bianca, to be part of a family again, this time with somebody who would not act like she was a monster would be nice.

Now that she got it, why she didn't want it? 

She was started to consider if her mother was actually wrong when she called her that.

Nico would deny it, of course, saying she didn't have the right to say that stuff, and probably it was Gaea's influence and Marie truly loved her. She wondered if he actually believed this stuff or was just to make her feel better, perhaps was both; and that possibility created butterflies in her stomach.

The child of Pluto wanted to rip the wings of each of those butterflies, anything to make that feeling stop.

* * *

It was ironic that the one ready to cry was Hazel, when she was the one breaking it off with him.

Frank looked surprised. They were dining in a fancy restaurant in New Rome, a date he had planned for a while. She knew it was a bad time, but she couldn't let him waste his money on a girl who didn't saw him that way anymore, and sadly she didn't get the guts to say it until they were about to order. Fuck, she felt like a dumbass.

And wasn't she one, seeing how she ended in this situation?

"You want to break up?" He seemed surprised, and slowly the surprise was started to transform into pain if his hurt look was anything to go by. 

She bit her lip, trying her best to blink so her eyes didn't become so watery. It wasn't fair at all; Frank was an amazing guy, sweet, caring, understanding, why she fell out of love with him? And for what she traded that love? For-

Fuck, she couldn't even say it, it left her with a bad taste in her mouth, and made her feel like she was carrying the world in her back, like Atlas. 

Hazel took the time to play with her fingers and try to not let the guilt eat her alive, but it felt like she was losing that battle. Frank deserves so much better; there was a time when she thought she was enough, at the top of the world both of the powers department and confidence, she still has the status (if that mattered to any of them); yet after the slow realization of what was happening to her, it was like none of her accomplishments mean anything, everything she worked so hard to get fell like a house of cards. 

And in any case, he should be with somebody who could love him fully, with somebody who wasn't so judgmental at the beginning of their friendship, who didn't try to stop her feelings just because she considered him embarrassing. With somebody who...who wasn't a-

She should say it at some point, at least in her mind, because if she was going to feel like this, at least she should be able to admit it. It was bad enough having those feelings, being a coward just made her feel even lower than she already did, and that was saying something. 

He looked at the table for a couple of minutes, probably processing this information. The son of Mars look up again, and with the most controlled voice he could muster, he said "Why?"

And at that, she finally broke and started to cry.

Gods she felt pathetic; she was the one doing the breakup, not the other way around. Yet, what else she was suppose to feel? She was ashamed, dirty, and felt isolated, since nobody else could understand her problem, she couldn't even say it in her mind let alone out loud. 

Like the gentleman he was, he came to her aid and put an arm on her shoulders, patting her reassuringly, even if his eyes seemed a little watery for this conversation. Why he was so nice? He should be mad, he probably would be if he knew the truth, Frank would hate her for sure-

At the thought of losing one of the people that were closest to her, she cries harder. 

"What that man do to her-"

"Aren't them the Praetors? They won the Giant War! Exactly what he told her that was able to make her break like that?"

"Is somebody forcing you or...?" Frank asked over the gossips, ignoring them the best he could, though she knew he was still self-conscious about his public image. Despite all he has done, his status or how he looked, Frank was still pretty insecure about himself, even if he should give himself more credit. 

No surprise he thought that since she looked so reeked; and Hazel wished she could say yes, that somehow she was forced by somebody to break up and it wasn't her fault. But it was, and since she couldn't even say him the whole story, the least she can do is be a sincere as she can. 

"N-No, I wish it was, but I felt out of love" Frank winced to that admission, but recovered fairly quickly, perhaps to not hurt her feelings. Wow, she really didn't deserve him "There is somebody else-"

"Does he treat you poorly?" 

"No! Is not that, or cheating, I promise is not cheating" Because that would never happen in any case, they could be the only two people on earth and she wouldn't stand a chance, and it was better that way. 

Despite all this situation, Frank smiles softly, even if it is sad "I know is not cheating, you aren't capable of it"

_ "You don't know of what I'm capable," _ she thought bitterly, because while is true she wasn't with somebody else behind his back, what she was doing was actually worse than that. He wouldn't think of that possibility, and that was a blessing she hated to like, because she didn't want to face the consequences of her feelings, and would take any advantage to cover it. 

"I'm sorry," She said with a deep, broken voice because that much was still the truth. 

He nodded, and answered with "Me too" and even if it was a breakup, he kissed her forehead as softly as he did when they started dating, and her tears fell harder. 

Why she couldn't love him instead? Why did she fell in love with Nico? 

* * *

She wondered if her feelings towards Will were thanks to her jealousy, or she just had a problem with the guy. 

Hazel didn't like how often he overstepped Nico's boundaries, how they had discussions over the smallest things, how Nico needed to prove so hard his mental issues when Will should have taken his word, especially for being the freaking doctor of the Greek Camp. Yet, it was difficult to say if that was because of her own feelings, or she just wished to well, be in his place.

She was the worst. 

"Are you okay with it?" Nico asked, with those doe eyes that were so expressive for somebody so somber, dark as coal, and shiny as galaxies. She had a picture of him in her wallet, as a token of her only family, but how she longingly looked at it didn't feel so sibling-like as it should. Thanks to the gods nobody had figured out that part yet. 

Blinking, she tilted her head to the side, confused; did she space out looking at him again? Shit, she needed to get a grip "Is this about Frank? Is alright, I broke up with him, after all"

And cried all night, but not exactly by mourning her relationship. 

"Not that- well, it was also that, but it was about well, me and Will"

Doing her best not to wince, she decided to pretend to be confused, what was partial truth "Why wouldn't be okay about it?" 

"Well, we are from the forties, and you were in a school run by nuns, so I guess I'm scared that well, you will hate me" He muttered a little sheepish, looking down to his feet and playing with his fingers. 

Hazel could almost laugh "Hate you?" She said incredulously, she shook her head, and part of her instincts was to reach out to him, but couldn't bring herself to do it, not when she knew what it did to her "Nico, I could never hate you" 

"Really? I mean, I know that you know about us for a while, but I just wanted to check-"

"Nico" she called him again, being serious "Fact aside that I adore you-" more than she should "I'm roman, you have a clue how many guys I saw kissing in the legion? And that is because I'm a girl, I had heard Frank complain of needed to remember people that in the baths they are supposed to be bathing, not...you know!"

She got a little flustered to that idea, especially because now she imagined somebody else in the Roman baths, and she couldn't go there.

He was a little pink, but laugh relieved despite everything "Yeah, I guess you needed to adapt to it sooner than later, huh?"

"You could say so," she half-smiled at him, and somehow this whole situation made her feel even more alone. He was now free of guilt, living openly in love with another man and nobody making complaints about it (at least at Camp, since it has zero-tolerance with that stuff; not only to be against homophobia but because their Camp Director wasn't exactly straight and nobody wanted to become a dolphin); she on the other hand? Well, even when the gods partake in it, it wasn't seemed as accepting for demigods, and even when it was her case, she didn't want that mentality to change.

She just wanted her crush to go away. Or she could still call it that? She didn't want to know. 

Then he took her hand, and those skeletal butterflies appeared; a timid smile drew in his thin lips, and as small as it shows it felt like the world to her, to be at the receiving end of something so precious as his grins, who were far and few between. "Thank you for accepting me"

_ "But you couldn't accept me, right? Not that I would blame you"  _ She thought, and part of her wanted to cry, knowing she wouldn't be loved back, that her love would be seen as monstrous and horrifying, because it was.

Because she was in love with her brother. 

* * *

The nights were the worst. 

It was when she was alone with her thoughts that these became untamed, dangerous. She was a teen and that involved certain urges that in her time would be unthinkable to talk, but were more open about it in this century. 

Except for the subject of her idea, that was still taboo. 

She hated herself for it, every single second she let herself slip in those fantasies, or even when she didn't and just let herself think of him. Nobody protected her like he did, risking so much for her wellbeing; she has never met somebody so selfless, that despite being treated poorly he gives his best for them, for an unforgiving world that has never given him a break. Nico had a pure heart, a kind soul that only a few people knew, and she felt blessed to be one of those, and cursed for in which light she saw it. 

Hazel wasn't sure at which moment things started to change, it was subtle. How she appreciated his skin turning back to his olive tone, his toned arms for his sword classes towards the little kids in the camp, those chapped lips suddenly turning appetizing, the desire of those caroused hands on her body-

Dammit, that was again, those sinful urges that claimed her to go to him, to do the unthinkable of asking him to be hers, and claim her as such. 

Because for her, he wasn't only her brother, or a dear friend, he could be a lover, a partner to kiss and more, and do things that were illegal both by roman law and the united states one. 

Why she has gone that way? Was she just born wrong, like her mother suggested, something monstrous inside her? Was this inevitable, since his nature was never going to stop enticing her, or maybe she could have done something to stop this? 

She couldn't know, and now she would put her hand in her south regions, and imagine things that would never there as much as she wished, and hate herself as soon as she crossed the moment of ecstasy.

Because the devil lived in her heart and was there to stay. 


End file.
